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Kerrian’sNotebook

KN, p. 207 “Sheila’s Resolutions for 2018”

 

Sheila here.  🙂 

Charlie is outside shoveling the walk again, so I’m posting my own Resolutions for 2018. First, a word about the fruitcakes that just kept coming, no matter how many moans and grumbles Charlie shared with the Kerrian readers. Personally, I think the Post Office gals are in on the joke, since more than half the fruitcakes (we counted 53 this year) were delivered anonymously between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I mean, how many return address labels can you ‘lose?’  LOLOL

 

I never stick to any of my own resolutions unless they are about cooking, reading, or gardening, so here goes – a doable list for me for 2018.

 

1) Create some recipes that contain chocolate. Chocolate is good for you.  🙂

2) Eat more chocolate. See #1.

 

3) Do the 10,000-step program. The back garden needs a few changes, so 10K a day should be easy. Bad weather? I’ll do laps inside the house or ride my stationary bike to get credit.

 

4) Plant some vegetables in the garden this year. It would be great to have fresh tomatoes and squash for the late summer quiches we make.

 

5) Take a golf lesson with my new driver. Maybe two lessons. I keep topping the ball.

 

6) Schedule a daily time to read. Right now, it’s hit or miss and I really want to read a few of the mysteries and thrillers that the gal at www.nightstandbookreviews.com has recommended.

 

7) Learn to make a flaky pie crust. I read that mixing cold water and cold vodka in equal parts to add to the flour, guarantees a flaky crust. Could that be true?

 

8) Clean out the attic. Charlie says it’s all my stuff up there, so if he cleans out the garage, I’ll do the attic.

 

9) Try new brands of chocolate. See #1. The local grocery store has added an entire six-foot section to the chocolate bar area. They finally know who their customers are.

 

10) Work on a guacamole dip for the playoff season. I have a secret ingredient. If it’s any good, we’ll share it in Kerrian’s Kitchen.

 

There you have it. A list that includes both self-improvement and bucket-list goals, but all possible. Except maybe the attic, because I really don’t want to do that one. One box at a time, right?

 

Thank you, the Kerrian readers, for your terrific support throughout the years. You are the BEST group of followers and we can’t brag about you enough.  🙂  🙂

 

Until next time, Happy Sleuthing!

 

 

 

 

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KN, p. 205 “Thanksgiving Is the BEST Holiday!”

 

What could be better than family and friends gathering together around a table heaped high with scrumptious, mouth-watering food? I can’t think of much. We’ve been more than fortunate over the years. We’ve been blessed.

 

We’ve got a roof over our heads, heat in the house, and always great chow, but we are well aware that not everyone is as fortunate. We came up with a list of what to do to make this Thanksgiving more comfortable for those living in challenging situations in our town.

 

  • Spend some time helping in the community during the Thanksgiving weekend.

 

  • Help at a soup kitchen this weekend or next.

 

  • Ask if the soup kitchen personnel would be willing to hand out a book along with the food (we provide the books).

 

  • Donate clean, warm jackets to a local shelter.

 

  • Visit an older friend or relative living in a Senior Center. Write a letter for them and/or read to them.

 

  • Arrange to have the church choir (or talented friends) sing to the residents at the local nursing home.

 

  • Donate books to a shelter.

 

  • Run an errand (or two) for a neighborhood shut-in.

 

  • Plan a visit to the hospital to see a sick friend, drop off a greeting card, call them.

 

  • Call a friend that lives alone and is unable to travel to see their family. 5 minutes of our time is all it takes to make someone smile.

 

Hug the family, be thankful for the blessings you enjoy, and have a great Thanksgiving!

 

 

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KN, p. 200 “200 Ways to Die an Unnatural Death”

 

Thanks to the readers around the world, we have reached another milestone. This is page # 200 for Kerrian’s Notebook.  🙂  Hear Hammett barking? And the shovels clanking?

 

When Kerrian’s Notebook came into being, Charlie and Sheila Kerrian never expected to be around for 200 pages, not counting the additional posts devoted to our famous (or is that infamous?) Visiting Detectives. That’s a ton of cases, a ton of fun, facts, and a few dead bodies.

 

In honor of that milestone, we have come up with a few more ways to die an unnatural death, bringing the total on our deadly lists to a lethal 200.

 

Unnatural death is a category used by coroners and Medical Examiners for classifying human deaths that can’t really be described as death by natural causes. It might cover events such as accidents, homicide, clueless behavior, being attacked by wildlife, or even war.

 

Keep in mind that law enforcement personnel only investigate these deaths if foul play is suspected. Criminal intent is not always apparent, and autopsies are only conducted when suspicious circumstances surround the corpse’s demise.

 

Many thanks to all of you that contributed to our earlier lists. It wouldn’t have been as much fun without your (sometimes nefarious) methods of offing some unlucky souls.  🙂

 

Take a look:

100 ways to die an unnatural death

 

50 more ways to die an unnatural death

 

30 more ways to die an unnatural death

 

and now… 20 more ways to die an unnatural death.

 

  1. Broken neck – pitching over the handlebars of a bicycle without a helmet on

 

  1. Broken neck – diving into the shallow end of a pool

 

  1. Death by handheld fireworks

 

  1. Electrocution while storm chasing in a paraglider

 

  1. Death by coyote while hiking

 

  1. Death by spotted eagle ray – it leapt out of the water & struck a woman in a boat in the face. She fell and struck her head on the boat. The ray died as well.

 

  1. Crushed by a dumpster
    1. Death by a rolling bale of hay

     

    1. Impaled by the horn on a statue of a bull

     

    1. Death by flying manhole cover

     

    1. Death by colliding with fire hydrant and drowning

     

    1. Death on a golf cart – woman fell on the broken glass from the wine glasses she had been holding

     

    1. Death by selfie – maybe that should be: death by standing too close to the edge

     

    1. Death by asphyxiation while hiding in a cupboard

     

    1. Drowning – in a vat of wine

     

    1. Drowning – in a cat’s water bowl

     

    1. Water hammer explosion

     

    1. Death by prop gun on a movie set

     

    1. Smothered by clothing and gifts tossed from balconies onto the person onstage.

     

    1. Death by extreme sports – B.A.S.E. jumping with a parachute from fixed points (Buildings, Antennas, Spans (bridges), the Earth (top of cliff))

     

     

    All true, folks, but #194?  Maybe that explains all the Hallmark TV episodes where the good guys are hiding in closets with LOTS of air holes.

     

     

     

    The real question: Do you have friends that will help carry the shovels and pitchforks?  😉

     

     

     

    If you are a writer and have used any of the ‘200 ways’ in your work, let us know in the comments and you can plug your book here.   🙂

     

     

    *Photos by Patti Phillips, but nothing dastardly happened while she took them and no bodies were left behind. Promise.

     

    *Kerrian’s Notebook, and all of its content, is intended for entertainment purposes only.

     

     

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